Roast your plants. Then help them thrive.
Plant Burn turns your questionable leaf decisions into a playful roast—then gives you practical, personalized care for what to do next.
No guilt trips. No fake green thumb required.
Brutally honest. Actually helpful.
A laugh first, then a clear plan for your next watering day.
The Plant Burn promise
A roast should leave your plant better off.
Care follows comedy
Every roast ends with useful next steps, not just a punchline.
Built for real homes
Advice considers light, routines, and the chaos of daily life.
No expert act required
Come with a sad pothos. Leave with a plan you can follow.
From roast to recovery
One photo. One reality check. A better care routine.
01 / Show us
Send the evidence.
Upload a photo and tell Plant Burn what has been going on: drooping, browning, overwatering—or simply vibes.
The good kind of callout
“Your monstera is not dramatic. It is standing in a hallway with no light.”
02 / Get the diagnosis
Find the likely culprit.
Learn what your plant is signaling and which changes matter first.
03 / Grow forward
Follow a care plan that fits.
Get small, timely actions for watering, light, and the next check-in.
Simple plans
Keep the roast. Upgrade the care.
Start free whenever a leaf looks suspicious. Upgrade when plant care becomes part of your routine.
Seedling
For curious plant people finding their voice.
$0 forever
- 5 roasts each month
- Care notes after every roast
- Save your plant profile
Canopy
For plant parents who want a kinder routine.
$6 / month
- Unlimited roasts
- Personalized care plans
- Seasonal care check-ins
- Plant care history
Your plants have feedback. Let’s hear it.
Bring the crispy leaves, the mysterious spots, and the watering regrets. Plant Burn will handle the rest.
Roast your first plant